Spring is so close I can taste it and I am loving breaking out my skirts (although let's work on the tan first Emma). Velvet Heart has my new favorite bomber for spring and it is perfection! I styled it with one of their tops (which comes in other colors) and a cute denim mini! Also, another trend for spring I wanted to try out was the bandana I think it is so boho and I am definitely rocking it in California in a few weeks! Hope you all are enjoying your week!
While sitting in class browsing Vogue (because paying attention wasn't on the agenda last week) I came across Christian Dior's Fall 2017 Ready-to-Wear collection and fell in love. Some trends I love from these recent shows are denim, 90's and edge and Dior brought all of that. While I know that all of these looks aren't really "ready to wear" these pieces are fun to think about adding to your wardrobe because they can all be worn so many different ways (and are so dang on trend right now). I think my favorite find from looking for these looks were these jeans and these boots!
It is crazy to me that sitting here in Starbucks I just stared at my blank blog post title trying to think of something to call this post... well anxiety is the best I could come up with. While I feel like this explanation isn't necessary I also feel like this blog has been the best thing that happened to me in high school and it deserves more than being a little neglected.
Five years ago (crazy how time flies) I started my freshman year of high school and if I could sum it up in a few words I think I would choose - the suckiest thing ever. If you want to know a little more about what I mean you can check out my super cringe-worthy video I made four years ago - here (brace yourself).
Fast forward four years after that video and anxiety was a thing of the past for me. It was almost like I couldn't remember how bad anxiety could make me feel. I was doing great, feeling great and stopped taking any medicine two years ago. Then like this massive dark cloud (think hurricane type cloud) anxiety came back into my life. My body was shaky, my mind was racing and I couldn't do anything. Class became a struggle and I decided to hide out at my parent's for a while. Anxiety has a way of making you feel like you are dying - everything has this looming hopeless doom over it and as soon as my eyes opened in the morning I knew what kind of day it was going to be. I was going to spend my day choking down tears, pretending I am ok all the while hoping that no one knew exactly how bad I felt. The past few weeks has been hell and instead of feeling in control I have been watching my body and myself go through the motions of life like an outsider.
Why am I telling you this? Well thankfully I do have a support system and people who care about me and love me, but sometimes that isn't enough. Sometimes having someone hug you and tell you it's going to be ok while they are living their life and you can't seem to get yours back hurts even more. SO this post serves two purposes. 1) You guys need a little explanation on why I am slacking lately. It is not because I don't want to blog - I do but right now I just can't. 2) I hope someone is reading this and nodding along with everything I am saying, not because I want anyone to ever feel the way I do, but because I really needed a post like this to make me feel like I wasn't alone. That I am not crazy and that this is just a bump in my life.
I did this five years ago - it sucked and I never wanted to do it again, but we all know life doesn't work that way. These were the cards I was dealt. Every single day I am angry about them but I really want to learn how to play the game of anxiety. I also want to find a way to make this more a part of my blog because right now my life isn't fantastic clothes and Instagram pictures. It is hard and people need to not only get the highlight reel.
If you made it this far... THANK YOU. For supporting me just by reading this and for taking a minute to understand someone's struggles.
Hey guys long time no talk! I have lots to update you on but for today I have a fun new video sharing my new makeup from Beauty Brands. My makeup collection was pathetic so it was time for a serious face lift and this was just that!! I linked everything I purchased in the description of the video here - so head to that link to shop! XO